Wonder Wines (2)—Shoe Opener

Click here for the "Wonder Wines" Resource Center—(all posts available)
Click here for the introduction to the Round and Square series "Wonder Wines"

This is an "short" post—click here for an explanation of Round and Square post lengths.

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One year ago on Round and Square (27 March 2013)—China's Lunar Calendar 2013 03-27
One year ago on Round and Square (27 March 2013)—New Religion: Unlucky Four
Two years ago on Round and Square (27 March 2012)—La Pensée Cyclique: Sociology and Sinology
Three years ago on Round and Square (27 March 2011)—Beginning: Beginnings Said

[a] "I've got it" RF

O.k., so you have settled into your nice hotel room after a long day at the conference. You can imagine nothing better than taking off your shoes, running a hot bubble bath, and then completing the relaxing journey with a nice glass of wine. It's right there on the cabinet, and you suddenly think to yourself..."a glass of wine and a hot bath sounds splendid." You open the drawer and look for the corkscrew (it's a nice bottle, with a real cork...cork). Nothing. You look in your luggage and shaving/cosmetics kit. Nothing. And there you are, buck naked and standing in the midst of a slow realization that you are going to have to use a glass cutter, your Swiss Army knife (this one lacks a corkscrew), or some kind of bottled magic.

[b] Nope RF

Wrong.

Just go get those dress shoes you just took off. Stick the base of the wine bottle in the shoe, find yourself a sturdy (stone, cement) wall, and start pounding. 

Then the janitor will come by with his (or her) broom and wonder why you are pounding your shoe against the basement wall...in your birthday suit (wear a towel, for god's sake).

NPR Shoe Opener 1:19

A life saver for the tired, desperate, oenophile.

It's tough to beat that.

Physics. It's a beautiful thing.

[c] Corkscrew RF